Who Are You, And How Do You Know Me?


Once again, I reach into my lovely mail bag and pull out an e-mail I got from a student about… his attempt to e-mail an HB9 he met at a party.

Some of the patterning was good, but it came off…just…BAD because the context was WAY OFF.

> I met this girl HB9 at a party full of people 3 weeks ago. I talked with her only for a few times and for short periods. We kept getting interrupted by her friends, an attempt by another guy to cockblock me. She behaved also like a social butterfly talking to different people, breaking conversations fast, etc. I managed to get her email address just before she left.

Yeah, in what context? In other words, was it done after you and she were into each other, you had captured and lead her imagination and emotions, future-paced spending time together, as in, “It’s too bad we can’t FIND A WAY TO HANG OUT AGAIN AND SEE WHAT WE COULD ENJOY”.

Or did you just say, “give me your email”?

I think it was more the latter, rather than the former. Anyway, let’s continue.

> My first email to her was two weeks later. It read:
>
> I am Randy, I enjoyed meeting you at the party. It was pleasant and without giving you the impression to be too serious, too early, I learned how much it is rare to find someone funny, authentically sympathetic, nice and charming; but enough about me, you seem to be also a potentially interesting girl 
>
> By observing you that evening, I noted that you were rather sympathetic and smiling. At the same time, you showed some reserve when in contact with new people. It is as if there is an interior conflict in you between a natural reserve and a desire to connect with others.
>
> You know, with me, you can feel at ease, be completely yourself without needing to play a social part or without having fear of being judged. The tolerance, the open mindedness and the compassion for me and the others you showed are paramount values which guide my way of being, thinking and acting.
>
> Could you describe me one of your passions? You know one of these activities in which you feel yourself completely transported, completely absorbed by what you do, where time seems to be slowing, until it stops and where you feel the spirit, the flame in you that shines. And it is in one of these moments, that you feel yourself more alive, that you feel the most passion and that you are more in contact with the spiritual force which is with each one of us and which then appears with the most clearness and beauty. For me, I am fascinated by literature and in particular by poetic creation. If you like also poetry, we could exchange poems and give our respective impressions.
>
> Please answer me,
> Randy

After trying to salvage the situation by snagging her e-mail address from the clutches of total defeat, why did you mastur-wait for two weeks before dropping her a line?

How do you know she liked you on that first meeting? From what you described, it seems like you were struggling to get two words in. How do you know? And then what? A personality reading? It comes across as begging for her approval, trying to impress her. Total AFC here.

Next, how was she tolerant, open minded and compassionate? How do you get all that from a casual chat at a party that kept getting interrupted?

Well, She Answered The Following Day

And…it was a doozy. I knew she’d answer – but I saw this coming before I even read that far.

> hi Randy,
>
> thank you for your message, but, how did you have my email?? you know, I spoke with many people that evening. what did we talk about, at which moment of the evening? what do you look like? sorry I can’t remember.
>
> unless you tell me more about you, I am sorry but I won’t be able to talk to you further.

Ouch. She didn’t even fucking recognize who you were. That’s my point. In a seduction situation, email, texting, phone calls, can work, but without a command of non-local influence, you have to put in the work IN PERSON, FACE TO FACE.

Peace…

Aldy Harold

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